Call unto me and I will answer thee and shew thee great and mighty things which thou knowest not. Jeremiah 33:3
So, my little heart was acting like Jonah and running away from the Lord. It was a miserable place to be in. Thankfully, the Lord didn't send a big fish after me.. He sent a preacher...
Sunday morning came around and I was delighted to learn that our old Youth Pastor would be preaching in the service. I eagerly awaited his message until he said the title "Don't waste your life"... ooh ouch. The Scripture he read was Acts 8:26-40~~~ You know the story of PHILIP and the ETHIOPIAN eunuch. I stifled the urge to tell the other 1499 people there that they could go home because obviously this message was for me! ;o) The Preacher began to preach and every verse, every illustration, every point was chisleing away at my heart. By the end of service I asked God to forgive me and told Him I would trust Him. You see it wasnt' that I didn't want another child.. I was afraid of the pain and the loss. God was asking me to trust Him.
I may never understand on this earth why our first children never came home to us. It is a wound in my heart.. it doesn't make sense to me.. but what I do know is that our God is a GOOD God. He loves those precious children and He loves me. He is the one who was with me through every step and he caught every tear I cried. He is faithful!
We once again began the paperchase..It went really well and really fast. Shortly after our Dossier went to Ethiopia we had a referral! Oh, a beautiful 8 month old boy.. Our Philip...
We waited for our court date and dreamed of the day our baby boy would be coming home. One day we received a group e-mail from Merrily at AAI about a little boy who had been waiting a long time for a family (15 months). He had been struggling for some time with a bad case of Molluscum. He was also adamnatly opposed to having his picture made. I believe Merrily described him as a wiggly and bumpy boy.
I couldn't get this little guy off of my mind as I went about my day. I prayed for him and that he would find a loving family. After a couple of hours I could take no more and decided to ask my dh what he would think if we adopted him. Our Homestudy approved us for two children.. I called him and held my breath for his response and knew it was from the Lord when he said, "You're not going to believe this but I was JUST thinking we really should adopt two children instead of one." I called Merrily and told her that we love wiggly bumpy little boys.. She laughed and said "Well, he sure is that!" She said we would be able to adopt him but we had to decide ASAP as our case was due to be filed in court any day. They faxed medical reports and e-mailed pics, but in our hearts it was already done.. we had another son..
And on July 23, 2005.. God kept that promise He had made to me more than two years earlier..
"Do not be afraid, for I am with you;
I will bring your children from the east
and gather you from the west." Isaiah 43:5